You poor, poor thing. Evie and I are so sorry you’re marginalized, looked over and left out. It seems that right after Halloween, all the stores go right into full-scale Christmas mode without giving you a second thought. It’s not fair, and it’s not right.
We love you, Thanksgiving, and we appreciate how important you are. You’re an authentic American holiday. What other holiday can boast the combination of turkey, pilgrims and mini marshmallows atop sweet potatoes? What other holiday can say it involves eating and eating until one is in physical pain? But you don’t even get a date, Thanksgiving! Whatever the fourth Thursday in November is, there you are. And then what do folks do not 24 hours after giving you but a cursory acknowledgement? They go Christmas shopping! Cretans!
This year Evie and I will let the world know that we refuse to celebrate Christmas without first giving you your proper due. We will slice and bake cookies embedded with turkeys and then trace additional turkeys in the shape of our hands. We’ll buy that weird multi-colored corn and hang it in our house without making one single Children of the Corn reference. We’ll watch A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving, read T Is For Turkey and sing “Tom, Tom the Turkey” until Evie’s daddy locks us in the garage.
We won’t stop our crusade, Thanksgiving, until you emerge proudly from Christmas’s shadow to stand proudly in the spotlight, bedecked with cornucopiae spilling over with plastic fruit and festive bowls filled with can-shaped cranberry sauce.
Don’t give up hope, Thanksgiving! We shall persevere!